It is my nature to make others happy. If someone asks me for help, I help. If I am asked to be on a committee, I volunteer. If I am asked to mentor a new teacher, I mentor. I pick up after my family. I give of my time and my energy...to a fault.
The result? I am tired. I am a tiny bit resentful. I am drained.
However, I have decided to change my mindset and philosophy over the past year. I had too much anxiety and had gained that menopausal/cortisol belly so many women acquire after the age of 45.
After discovering how empowering art has been for my soul, I have adopted a new philosophy:
I will say YES to things I normally would say NO to out of fear, and NO to things I normally would say YES to out of obligation.
This new philosophy has opened exciting doors for me that I was not expecting.
After posting my artwork on Instagram, as encouraged by the Get Messy Art Journal community, I got a message from a friend who owns a funky clothing boutique. She wondered if I would be her Winter Downtown Art Walk artist. My work would hang in her shop for the month of December and be featured for the December 8th Art Walk.
Me? An Art Walk artist? I felt the fear bubble up and Imposter Syndrome begin to descend. I could never do this. Would people come? Would people like my work? Could I make a cohesive show that could be taken seriously? Should I sell my work? Would my friend be happy? Am I good enough?
I almost said no. But that voice that has been nagging me for so long slapped me across my face and said, “This is your chance to breakout of your shell. This is your chance to show people your soul. This is your chance. Say yes. Say yes.”
The result? I have one WEEK to finish my show. Imposter Syndrome still brings the questions of self-doubt to the surface, but I am feeling more confident. I am doing this show for myself. If others come and like my work, that’s a bonus. This show is ultimately for me. I am excited to prove to myself that I can do this. I am excited to see where YES leads me.
Here is the invitation to my show. I would love to see you there.